Home Stretch

Forgive me for not writing

See, in between packing and planning and interviewing for people that will live in Scotts home, there has been stolen moments of sweetness, and this is how I've been spending those moments inbetween my Fafing virgo plan fest. What I have to say is that I love how it's all come together. I love learning how S and I work together to make it work. It's been a lot. From early morning to late night we've been painting and measuring and cleaning and putting down new soil. Interviewing and calling and somewhere in between, sweet sleep. See, as I am now called, the "master planner" has definitely been thrown off course by spontaneity. This has been a good stretch for me, learning how to use those muscles. Learning how to be accountable and accommodating and plan with someone that you love that you want the best for. How to work as a team and share victories and frustration and sometimes, say nothing, it can be better that way. We truly and deliriously want the best for eachother, to bring out the best and assist with the rough spots. And I think we have gone through this incredibly well together, learned how to really be a team. Learned to appreciate and know each others strengths , and where we have room to grow. Fixing up his house and planning to go to the woods together has been so good to us. And for us. And now how to be good to others who will share his family home. It's a truly intimate experience. Now we know what we are made of, and it is strong and sweet. We have much to look forward to.

The anxiety and stress of the past few weeks has passed. It's wild how that filled me. Haven't felt it like that, well, ever. Don't do well in last minute plans. Now I know why. Learning how to be more flexibleI don't know, time to get back to the practice. Very clear how putting any self care aside really gets me off track quickly. I think the root of it is that as J and I would say, I am a tree living a birds life. After rooting down in Sf for so long, I have been flittering here and there. Truth is I love home. My virgo nurture nature needs my spot. J and I make home whereever we are, which is what the "fafe" is all about. My truth right now is that it is only where I am. In a tent. In a beautiful bright room at my sisters. At the cozy nook at my moms. At a friends house in SF. My storage space in SF that I still rent. In S's studio where I will possibly be wintering. And now, back in my tree house, my tent in the woods. I am getting used to this nomadic transiant lifestyle. Truly a gypsy for sure, now more than just my blood rite ("gypsy give me your tears" rattles in my head daily). As I've been packing I've been astonished by "the stuff". Its all just stuff! Really, do we need it? I've tried not to collect so much. Even now I am relinquishing my family furniture in return for the freedom I will have, less for my caravan. I am truly a citizen of the universe. And I am anticipating a sweet ride.

So yes, tonight I pick up my sister Breezy to bring her back to NJ from Colorado where she will be making her home. Girls grown her own wings. So happy for her. Will spend the next few days packing up and finishing work in Newark and getting ready for the pilgrimage back to the fireflies , trees, and the light. I might not be here for a while. I will try to keep up as I did last summer, but we'll see. Know that those I know - I know and love, and those I don't , I appreciate your care and well wishes. Till then my sweets~*